6 Ways to tame your Imposter Syndrome

• You’re not supposed to be here?
• You’re not good enough?
• Everyone is about to find out that you’re not good enough

What words or phrases have you used or heard clients use that may signal Imposter Syndrome?

In the last ten years, the term Imposter Syndrome has become more widely known, we know that it can impact anyone, regardless of job or social status, all genders, and all cultures. However high-achieving individuals are known to experience it more often.

Clients may bring this to coaching, either using the words ‘Imposter Syndrome’ or by describing characteristics of anxiety and overwhelm, pressure, and perfectionism.  Or dependency on performance and achievement for self-validation and discounting successes.

The term ‘Imposter Syndrome' was first coined as a term in 1978 by two psychologists, Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes who studied high-achieving young women at Georgia State University. These young women presented with symptoms of anxiety; lack of self-confidence, and frustration. Clance and Imes found that these young women tended to attribute their success to external factors saying things like “I’ve been lucky”, rather than intrinsic qualities such as their skills or experience.  

Clance also wrote how imposter syndrome is often driven by fear of failure and often presents itself during times of growth and stepping outside of comfort zones.

In coaching, we may look at limiting beliefs like “I’m not good enough” and support our clients to reframe them. While this is fundamental to our work, we may choose to expand our toolkit to better support our clients who seek support around Imposter Syndrome or the need to hyper-achieve.

Ways that I work with my clients to tame Imposter Syndrome are:

1. Explore the language  - ‘Imposter Syndrome’ may be a problematic term. Interestingly, Clance and Imes first described this as ‘Imposter Phenomenon’, which sits more comfortably for me as ‘syndrome’ has medical undertones, suggesting it is a problem belonging to an individual and infers that it can be ‘cured’. For more on this, see the HBR article below.
2. Normalise it - Imposter syndrome can be a source of shame and guilt. There is a pervasive feeling in the individual that they have somehow got to where they are by mistake, that they are a fraud and that they will be found out.  Sharing examples from others who have experienced Imposter Syndrome - Did you know that the following people have shared openly about their experience of imposter syndrome?  Maya Angelou, Lady Gaga, Tom Hanks, as well as many coaches, myself included.
3. Is what the client brings to coaching Imposter Syndrome? -  As coach, we are not there to diagnose!   It is normal and healthy to ‘feel the fear’ when we step into a new role. We may be conscious that we are not ‘the finished article’ and that we are being judged. This will dissipate with time and experience. The difference with Imposter Syndrome is that it persists over time, even when we are well-established in a role, and if ignored, it can negatively affect our well-being.
4. Explore the systems - Clients might say, ‘There is nobody else in a senior position who looks like me’ or ‘I feel like I have to defer to…., even though they are the same level as me.’   Coaching can help clients explore what is challenging them in their systems - workplace, school, family, and community that causes them to feel ‘less than’. And clients may benefit from encouragement to find or create role models, even if they create them.
5. Create a persona for your Imposter Syndrome - Trying to quash or ignore the voice of the imposter won’t work. It will sit in the subconscious and sabotage us or impact our confidence. When we create a persona, we can start to communicate with the voice of the imposter, which is far more powerful than being a victim of a harsh, critical voice.   The voice of the imposter is the voice of our fear-based brains, trying to keep us safe. The imposter can be soothed by feeling acknowledged.  For example, my imposter is called Brian. Brian doesn’t like risk or variety. So when he sees me doing something new, or something he feels I’m underqualified for, he becomes agitated. He warns me that I will be judged and that I’d be much better off staying at home on the sofa. Knowing that Brian just wants to keep me safe,  I can thank Brian for his concern and let him know that it’s ok for me to deliver this talk, make the phone call etc.
6. Use a Strengths-based approach from Positive Psychology -  What are the unique strengths and skills that you have? Where have you made progress in recent weeks?    When we focus on Imposter Syndrome we are focusing on ourselves: our doubts, insecurities and fears.  When we shift our focus from ourselves to others and how we can serve, the story changes.

C.S Lewis said, “Humility is not thinking of ourselves but thinking of ourselves less.” 

When we shift our focus, we can ask ourselves more empowering questions:   

- “What value do I bring?”;  

- “Who needs my skills?”; 

- "What is my unique contribution?”

Examples of coaching situations where this model can be helpful;

• Career development coaching
• Identity coaching and personal development
• Leadership development coaching
• Wellbeing coaching
• Mindset Coaching
• Life Coaching generally

So let me ask you a question…when, if at all, have you experienced Imposter Syndrome? What triggered Imposter Syndrome for you?  

If you were to give your ‘Imposter’ a name, what would that be?  What does the voice of your Imposter sound like? What words would you use to like to use to calm the voice of your imposter?