From vet to coaching high achieving perfectionists

Discovering the Power of Listening

My journey to coaching started back when I was a student. In my second year of university I trained as a Peer Supporter, receiving 30 hours of training from the university’s counselling service and then supporting fellow students and attending fortnightly reflective practice for the rest of my time at university. I have always been compassionate and wanted to help people but I lacked the confidence to actually help and never knew what to say. This training gave me the confidence and knowledge to be able to listen deeply and ensure the other person felt truly supported. I then remember being in my 4th year of vet school thinking, “I’m not sure I actually want to be a vet anymore.” and I gave myself permission to try it for a few years, but to change my mind if it wasn’t working out.

The Turning Point

When I had been working as a vet in practice for 3.5 years I had a few months struggling with my mental health. After my recovery I decided to work with a coach because I was determined to stay well. As a result of this coaching I swapped to a part time vet role, which enabled me to complete my Personal Performance Diploma with The Coaching Academy, which came to me on the recommendation of a colleague.  I am also trained in Stress Management and Wellbeing. 

Coaching Skills That Changed Everything

I loved the experiential learning with The Coaching Academy and as much as the sessions themselves, it was the break and lunch times between the sessions that were also invaluable. This is where conversations with fellow coaches about what we had learned really helped to cement it in my mind, and especially when they pointed out that I had asked a “Why” question as without this in the moment feedback I wouldn’t have realised myself. This really challenged me to consider the questions I was asking and to rephrase the ‘Why’ questions. Funnily enough I now avoid asking ‘why’ questions in any area of my life, not just in my coaching and I think this has had a positive effect on these conversations and my relationships. Not least because I now have a preschool aged child who rarely asks ‘Why’ and instead asks me things like, “Mummy, are milk teeth made of milk?” and “But HOW does calcium get into teeth?” which is amazing!

My favourite coaching tool is a deeper version of the “What would you advise a friend in this situation?” type questions. I find that question can be hard to answer when someone is deep within their own problem. So instead I get them to embody the different persona before asking this question and it then becomes much easier for them to answer.

Supporting Perfectionists to Thrive

I now combine my coaching and training skills to help high-achieving perfectionists reclaim their time so that they can go to bed each night feeling satisfied; with themselves, their day and their life WITHOUT feeling like they are compromising their standards or burning out.

My clients first come to me drowning under the weight of the expectations they have for themselves. Sometimes procrastination is a big problem, because the effort involved in making it “good enough” feels overwhelming, so they can’t start. Or because there is so much on their to-do list, that they can’t decide what to do first.

Other times they will go over and over a piece of work, never actually completing it because they always feel like it could be better. They also tend to beat themselves up for their lack of progress, questioning why they can’t just get stuff done and comparing themselves negatively to others they see on social media. As a result, they spend a lot of time in their heads, or doom scrolling. Work projects stall and their relationships suffer.

Real Stories, Real Change

I love seeing how my clients evolve and blossom as a result of our work together. They put the work in and their mindset and way of being shifts. They feel happier and more connected and get so much more done. The interesting thing I’ve noticed is that if you can get people feeling good, it is easier for them to do the difficult or important things. Including those boring but helpful habits that help them continue to feel good. And the more they do those things, the better they feel.

What my clients are saying about the journey;-

“When I met Charlotte I was struggling with the ability to switch off after work to the point that it impacted my free time and my relationships. After 3 months of coaching I have noticed a significant improvement in my emotional state during my time off, and I have developed lifelong strategies to deal with work related worries. I worry much less about work now and am able to more easily switch off and be present with the people I care about.”

“I’ve come to understand that it’s okay if everything isn’t perfect (for example if the house is a bit of a mess), as long as I’m making progress on my main goals.” from a client who was wanting to complete an extra qualification but struggling to find time to study.

“Charlotte helped me to leave work each day feeling proud of what I had achieved.” from a client who felt like they were failing at home and at work.

“I feel healthier, more positive and more caring towards myself. I have taken the pressure off myself. Charlotte has helped me more than anybody.” from a client who had tried lots of other forms of support before coming to me."

Expanding My Coaching Impact

Right now, I am working on expanding what I am offering beyond 1-1 to enable me to help more people. I am almost ready to launch; “The Decision-Making Framework for Perfectionists: Make the Decision. Start Living. Because Overthinking is Stealing Your Life." and I will be trialling offering 1-1 voice note coaching as well as a group coaching programme to enable me to support people at a lower price-point too so I am excited to see the impact I can have with these over the next few years.

Thank you Charlotte for sharing your inspiring coaching journey with us!